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Monday 14 March 2016

Now You've Got To Be Strong



Now you've got to draw close.
Wrap your arms around your body, use you hands to
Protect your heart.
Create some sort of barrier.
Do the hard things you aren't sure you can do.

Now you've got be strong.
Not give anything away.
Hold your hand across your mouth
And not give fear a voice.

Now you're going to become familiar with a new sort of chaos.
With things that will hurt and damage.
Familiar with watching someone you love more than yourself fall apart.
Familiar with distance and not being able to reach them sometimes.

Now your heart will break
And you will cry a million private tears,
Into towels in the bathroom
While you do your makeup.
Into pillows.
Into your hands.
At any time of day.
And maybe no one believes you.
Or maybe they think it's your fault.
You haven't done enough.
You have done too much,
In any case, you can never win.
There will always be those who see the ways you have failed with this.

But now you have to focus.
On moments.  The small singular softer moments.
On loving and loving and reassuring that you love,

Now you must become the safest harbor there is.
The very safest place you could ever imagine
For someone who is hurting in ways you don't understand.
Now you have to open your arms
And make room for all this sorrow.
You slowly kneel on the floor and collect shattered pieces of everything broken.
Lego. Glass. Hearts.
All in disarray.
Now you have to try
To put everything back together,

Now you've got to be stronger than you expected you'd need to be.
And you can be.
You can be
Both warrior and peacemaker
Both a storm and a safe place
For the ones you love.


10 comments:

  1. Oh, my.....Those last 6 lines sum up my current challenge!
    Praying for your heart today, Warrior Friend!

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    1. I hope that everything is ok with you Rebecca. Praying for you and your family too my dear friend.

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  2. Inspiring words and thoughts ! Thank you very much for revealing those weak moments that we all try to hide somehow thinking they are not common or part of everyone else's life.

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    1. Lamiss, so nice to hear from you. :) Thank you for your comment.

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  3. You are a warrior with those of us who started the journey a little earlier. Hold your head up high, you are doing the very best you can. You will learn new things to make it better, you will move into your new normal. Everything will be different, but still good! I am here, holding your hand every step of the way!

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    1. Mavis thank you so much!! I appreciate you! <3

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  4. You always write straight from the heart,but you have also given words to the emotions churning in hearts dealing with a crises.
    Yes we have to be strong even when we cry in bathrooms and see things falling apart around us.What else can we do?
    Colleen you made me cry.

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